6: The Job I Didn't Know I Needed

Searching for Something More

Something people often ask me when I mention I’m job searching is, “So, what do you want to do?” When I was in high school, answering “I don’t know” felt acceptable. But now that I’m 24, that answer seems to draw more judgment than understanding.

About a year ago, I was feeling defeated. My days followed the same dull routine: work my part-time job, come home, feed the dogs, and watch TV. Night after night. I didn’t feel like I had a purpose. There was nothing to be excited for, nothing to look forward to, and it was quietly destroying me. One day, I decided I couldn’t live like that anymore.

After the “What do you want to do” question, people usually follow up with, “Well, what are you passionate about?” And again, my answer was usually another “I don’t know.” But that isn’t completely true. The only thing I’ve ever truly been passionate about is musical theater. People often push me to pick something else, something more “practical,” but that’s always been where my heart is.

One day, I decided I couldn’t live in the constant dullness that came with my everyday routine. I reached out to my high school musical’s assistant director to see if they needed any help or volunteers. To my surprise, she said yes. She took me under her wing to help with all sorts of behind-the-scenes tasks. Before I knew it, auditions had arrived, and I was there taking headshots for the program. By the end of the process, I’d been promoted to choreographer when the original choreographer had to step down last minute. I thought it would just be a fun side thing, but it ended up being the biggest breath of fresh air I’d taken in years.

Finding My Spark Again

When I started choreographing that year’s musical, The Addams Family, I quickly became overwhelmed. I’d never worked with high school students in that kind of setting, and I was nervous they wouldn’t like me. My goal going in was simple: to be the person I needed when I was their age.

Musical theater is joyful and expressive, but it can also be stressful, especially for kids in leading roles. When I was in their shoes, all I really needed was someone who believed in me completely. That became my mission. I wanted every student to feel seen, heard, and valued.

The first day I taught choreography, I had to teach over 40 middle and high schoolers a five-minute routine. It was overwhelming and nerve-racking, but that day, something in me lit up. I fell back in love with dancing, and at the same time, I fell in love with working with those kids. I’d never thought of myself as particularly great with kids, but something about this group just clicked. They reminded me why I fell in love with theater in the first place.

Confidence in the Chaos

After that rehearsal, my passion grew stronger with every practice. Instead of my stagnant routine, I was now up and moving, laughing, and connecting with a wonderful group of students. Though I’d only choreographed one musical before, it challenged and inspired me in the best way.

I had to be creative, flexible, and confident: three things I didn’t always associate with myself. But I rediscovered strengths I’d forgotten: I was good at communicating, at leading, and at building connections with so many different personalities.

I also learned to adapt when things didn’t go as planned. There were days when I had to change choreography on the fly with only one rehearsal left, and I learned that I could stay calm under pressure because if I lost my cool, the kids would follow. I realized I’m good at bringing positivity and making others feel seen and supported.

Choreographing a musical with forty kids is messy, chaotic, and unpredictable, but I’ve never felt more certain that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.

Redefining Success

While I was in the thick of job searching, this little “after-work job” found me when I least expected it, and thank goodness it did. Even though it’s not a full-time position, it’s given me a renewed sense of purpose. Now, I have kids who look up to me, trust me, and come to me for guidance. I’ve become the person I once needed at their age.

This experience has reminded me that fulfillment doesn’t always come from a full-time job with benefits or a six-figure salary. I’d choose being paid nothing and feeling genuinely fulfilled over a big paycheck any day. Not every meaningful career moment comes from a job title or an Indeed posting. Sometimes, it’s found in the middle of a chaotic rehearsal when everything just clicks.

I haven’t yet found a full-time position that makes me feel as alive as this does, and that’s been hard. But this choreography job has made me feel more like myself than I have in years.

Looking Ahead with Gratitude

It’s the start of a new musical season, and this year, I get to be even more involved behind the scenes. We’ve only held auditions so far, but I’m already so excited to dive in, get to know this year’s cast, and keep doing something that lights me up.

So when people ask, “What do you want to do?” you can see why that’s a complicated question. People often laugh or look at me strangely when I tell them I choreograph high school musicals for little to no pay. They remind me it’s not a “real job.” But the truth is, it’s the only thing that’s ever made me feel truly alive.

When this opportunity came along, I wasn’t looking for it. I just wanted to be part of something I loved. But the coolest thing is that sometimes the work that finds you ends up being the work that heals you.

This is what people mean when they talk about finding a job that excites you. But what happens when those jobs don’t come with a full-time title or benefits? I don’t know yet, but I do know that I finally have something to look forward to, and that’s enough for now.

Here’s to progress, not perfection.

-Jordan